This has nothing to do with Hitchhiker.
I have no suitable-for-posting blurbs written about that, (one that I just wrote is a huge spoiler) so I wrote something else. This is a story I've been planning for a while.
My name is Morgan.
Undoubtedly, you know me as the wicked witch or the evil queen. I don't blame you for thinking that; Snow White has gotten everyone confused. But I know the real story of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, and if you want to hear it, I'll tell you. Juts be warned that believing me is an act of high treason.
First of all, I'd like to make it clear that I do not dabble in dark magic. I'm no witch. What I do is what my grandmother taught me; I use natural ingredients from the earth from the earth to create things that silly minds call potions and witch's brews. Second, I will quite openly admit that Snow White is prettier than me. Third, I do have a magic mirror. It's a treasured gift from my friend Malificent and I hate it when people say it's evil.
The fourth thing I would like to point out is that I am only Snow White's stepmother because my parents forced me to. I was sixteen when my noble-born father made an arrangement with King Gerard (ugh, how could I marry a man with that name?) for our marriage after Queen Lilla died. I was ashen-faced throughout the entire wedding. Want to know why? Not only was I simply reluctant to marry a 50-year old man, but I was quite in love with someone else! Imagine telling your true love that you're leaving him because you must marry a scruffy old king. Tristan was heartbroken, to say the least.
Snow White is only two years younger than me. I'm sure you can imagine how much influence and authority a sixteen-year old stepmother has over a sassy, vain, fourteen-year old princess. We didn't get along well, needless to say. But all her subjects, of course, thought she was just the sweetest thing.
One day Snow White was throwing a fit and told me that I was an ugly old peasant. Feeling I should at least try to take control of my stepdaughter, I punished her by sending her to the courtyard to wash the stones for five minutes. I also sent Tristan, who happened to be a knight, to guard her (and make sure she didn't try to get out of her chore). Four minutes later he came back escorted by guards, accused of having caused "the princess' disappearance". Visiting him in the dungeon, I learned the truth: Snow White had knocked him out cold and then must have run away. I was a little upset that he'd allowed a little girl to knock him out, but I forgave him soon enough and helped him escape.
Just a couple days later, the kind received a letter from Snow saying she wouldn't come back unless I was gone, and proceeded to accuse me of abusing her as well as making her scrub the courtyard. Absurd, of course, but the king promptly divorced me and sent me away quite humiliated and penniless. On her way home, Snow saw me making a fire with 'my magical potions' as I spent the night in a miserable cave. Therefore, when she got home, she claimed that I was a witch and, naturally, tried to hunt me down...
That's all. It's the introduction to a story where I switch the villain and heroine around. Might do that with a lot of other fairy tales, too. What do you think?
-Ashley
P.S. Hey, a post before 11:00! :D
Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!!! THIS IS AMAZING!! FREAKING BRILLIANT, MY FRIEND!! *applause* That was amazing, Ash!! :D And yay, I'm glad you're back out of writer's block!! :)
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone on Goodreads (Zechariah?) know about your blog? You should totally put the link on your profile!! I'm sure they'd love to read it. ;)
I did put the link! :) And thank you!!!!! :D
DeleteOh, wow.
ReplyDeleteHow did you -- You -- What happened?!
You just flipped my image of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves completely on its head in less than five minutes :D *shakes head in wonder* I went from, well, hating the step-mother and siding with Snow White, to wanting to slap Snow round the face and befriend Morgan!
That was . . . amazing! You should totally write it. I do have a question, though -- If you wrote it, would this introduction come at the beginning? Because it's a great summary of what you've done to the story, but it might have a greater effect if the reader finds all that out during the story? Hmm.
Sounds brilliant, anyway, Ash:D I love the whole idea, bravo! :)
Yeah, that's not the beginning of the story :D Just the kind of thing one might read on the back of the book, in a condensed version, of course. SO GLAD YOU LIKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DeleteOh, wow.
ReplyDeleteHow did you -- You -- What happened?!
You just flipped my image of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves completely on its head in less than five minutes :D *shakes head in wonder* I went from, well, hating the step-mother and siding with Snow White, to wanting to slap Snow round the face and befriend Morgan!
That was . . . amazing! You should totally write it. I do have a question, though -- If you wrote it, would this introduction come at the beginning? Because it's a great summary of what you've done to the story, but it might have a greater effect if the reader finds all that out during the story? Hmm.
Sounds brilliant, anyway, Ash:D I love the whole idea, bravo! :)